Reflection.

My father died on the 24th February 1990. He would have been 78 this year.

His departure when I was merely 13+year old made me realised that I have to change my life and to be an adult at super speed.

I took this as a sign to reflect on the changes I made to my life, and to remember those moments before I became senile.

Scene 1 - VI Hostel years

It only happened when I was give the opportunity to stay at VI Hostel in Form 3. It really is an eye opener. Here, I was introduced to many hard working bright students and at that time my Form 1 and Form 2 was filled with having self-pity during my father's visits and stays at HKL (previously GH) and his departure.

Scene 2 - Science 6

I tried to study the missing two years and my SRP was not that bad. Alas, I was booted to the last Science Class when all these while I thought I could be in the top three classes.

That was the first time I really need to change. I studied very hard trying to prove to every one that they have made a mistake for my being in the last class.

I met Hazrin Hassan, a jovial fellow with the same bitterness about being mis-placed.  We also noticed that many class mates were also bitter. Some, like Syed (Arab), he transferred to Technical Institute Penang. But many decided to stay as their love for the school (or being associated with it), but many rebel by being obnoxious and do not intend to study.

My monthly exam results were as good as the Top 3 classes students, but I fell sick during my SPM exams with rashes.

Hazrin and I managed to obtain Grade 1, making two of the only three students making it from Bottom 3 classes.

Scene 3 - UPM days

I was training with Serdang Angels, UPM students' rugby team. And at one time, I was listed to play for Serdang Devils, the staffs team. If not because of some other team threatened to report to the officials, I would have taken credit for playing for both teams, legal or not.

My results were tumbling due to too much rugby. And I was thinking of mom, brothers and sister who might witness my being booted out of the Uni.

Feeling extremely sad, one day I kneeled and sobbed after prayer asking ‎اللّهُ swt. to give me one more chance.

Alhamdulillah, I was given that chance.

That was the year 1984 and National Economic Policy was due to end six years later. The then government decided to send as many students to overseas, and I, even with the average SPM result, was given this opportunity.